Akbar Asal Mein Kon Thha? Aaj Pata Chala

Teacher Ne Pappu Se Puchha.

Teacher: “Pappu Batao, Akbar Kon Thha?”

Pappu: “Ji Mam, Akbar Ek Gay Thha”

Teacher Ke Ye Sun Ke Tote Udd Gaye Ki Pappu Kya Bol Raha Hai.

Teacher: “Kya Bakwas Kar Rahe Ho”

Pappu: “Mam Humne Hamesha Laila–Majnu, Heer-Ranjha, Adam-Eve, Soni-Mahival Ka Naam Suna Hai, Par Sirf Akbar-Birbal Hi Kyu?”

Bechari Teacher Bhi Kya Jawab Deti

Apne Bete Ko Tamiz Sikhao

Santa Ko Pappu Ke Master Ne Bulaya Aur Gusse Se Bola.

Sir: “Aap Apne Bete Ko Tamij Sikhao”

Santa: “Kyu Kya Ho Gaya?”

Sir: “Admission Form Mein Sex Wale Column Mein Isne Likha – Nahi Karta, Par Kabhi Kabhi Muth Maar Leta Hu”

Santa: “Master Ji, Par Ab Main Cofuse Ho Ki Isko Tameez Sikhau Ya Sex Karna“

Rajinikanth X-Ray Eyes

College Mein Ek Ladke Ne Chinki Ko Dekha Aur Uska Majak Udane Ke Liye Bola

Boy: “Tumne Lal Color Ki Bra Pahni Hai Na?”

Chinki: “Tumhe Kaisi Pata?”

Boy: “Mere Pass Rajinikanth X-Ray Eyes Hai”

Chinki Kuch Soch Ke Boli: “Tumne Bhi To Underwear Nahi Pahna”

Ladka Hairan Ho Gaya Aur Pucha: “Tumhare Pass Bhi Rajinikanth X-Ray Eyes Hai?”

Chinki: “Gaandu Apni Zip Band Kar Le“

Ladkiyo Ka Weight, Tauba Tauba

Delhi Bus Stand Pe Weight Wali Machine Pe Ek Ladki Ne Weight Tola.

Weight – 58kg

Usne Kuch Socha Aur Fir Sandal Remove Kiye

Weight – 57kg

Kandhe Pe Latka Bag Utara

Weight – 55kg

Duppatta Utara

Weight – 54kg

Jacket Utari

Weight – 52kg

And Fir Achanak Uske Sikke Khatam Ho Gaye.

Piche Pappu Khada Thha, Ye Dekh Bola.

“Aap Ruko Mat Mere Pass Kafi Sare Coins Hai“

Girls Skirts Mein Bahut Sexy Lagti Hai, Aur Ladke?

Chinki Ki Friend Ne Us Se Pucha.

Friend: “Yaar Jab Hum Ladkiya Mini Skirt Dalti Hai To, Kitni Sexy Lagti Hai”

Chinki: “Haan To?”

Friend: “Soch Agar Ladke Bhi Mini Skirt Pahne To Kaisi Lagenge?”

Chinki Hasti Hui Boli: “Church Bell Ki Tarha“

Happy Teacher Day in Pappu Style

Pappu’s Quote On Teacher Day

Behind Every Successful Student There Is One Girlfriend.

And Behind Many Failed Student ? ????????????

A Beautiful & Sexy Teacher

“Happy Teacher Day”

A Notice For Girl Workers

A Notice In A Factory For Girl Workers.

If Your Skirt Is Long, Protect Yourself From Machines

But If Your Skirt Is Short, Protect Yourself From Mechanical Engineers

Samajh Nahi Aata Tumhe Chand Kahu Ya Chakor

Ladke Ki Nayi Nayi Shadi Hui, Rat Ko Kamre Mein Gaya Aur Dulhan Ka Ghungat Utha Ke Uska Chehra Dekh Ke Bola.

Dulha: “Tum Itni Sunder Ho, Samajh Mein Nahi Aata Tumhe Kya Kahu?”

Bahar Khada Uska Baap Sun Raha Thha, Ye Sun Ke Bola.

Baap: “Beta Bas Use Ek Baar Maa Kahde, Baki Mein Dekh Lunga“

Oh My God, Where is She

A Man Was Doing Push Ups On A Beach.

Drunk Santa Saw Him & Started Laughing

Sorry To Tell You, But The Woman Below You Has Left Already

Sexy Kolaveri aka CHODAVERI

Why dis Chodaveri Chodaveri Chodaveri di..
"Gf in Room Room,
Wearing Bra white,
Nipple color light light,
Mine Lund Tight"
Why dis Chodaveri Chodaveri di..
"Hand la Bra,
Bra da Boobs,
Boobs full milk.
Wetty choot,
Lund cum,
Sex like silk.
Boobs Boobs
Sexy Boobs,i want suck now..
Choot Choot
Wetty Choot,i want fuck now"
"Guys m fucking now,she's screaming now..
This msg is for Chodu Boys,we dnt have choice"
Why dis Chodaveri Chodaveri di!!

Government Job Ke Haal, India Mein

Ek Aadmi Govt Office Mein Job Ke Liye Interview Dene Gaya.

Interviewer: “Aapki Koi Majboori To Nahi?”

Aadmi: “Ji Sir, Darasal Main Pehle Fauj Mein Tha, Jung Ke Dauraan Meri Taangon Ke Darmiyaan Ek Bomb Phata Aur Mere Tatte Ud Gaye, Aur Ab Mujhe Kaam Ki Jarurat Hai”

Interviewer: “Yeh To Koi Problem Nahi, Monday Se Aap Bas Join Kare. Hum Sab 9 Baje Aate Hai, Aap 11 Baje Aana.”

Aadmi: “Aisa Kyun?”

Interviewer: “Hum Sab 11 Baje Tak Kuch Nahi Karte, Bas Tatte Khujlate Rehte Hai.“

Army General’s Car And His Wife?

What Is The Common Between An Army General’s Car And His Wife?

Ans: “Both Are Highly Maintained And Very Less Used.“

Kamaal Ki ATM Machine

Santa Ek Bar USA Gaya To Vaha Uska Bhi Dil Kara Ki Ek Club Mein Jau Aur Dekho Kitna Maja Hai Vaha Ki Life Mein.

Club Mein Dancer Dance Kar Rahi Thhi, Thoda Sa Jhuki Toh,

American Ne $100 Uski Bra Mein Dale, British Ne $200 Dale,

Santa Ne Dimag Lagaya Aur ATM Card Uski Gaand Mein Ghusa Ke Swap Karvaya Aur $300 Leke Chalta Bana.

Difference Between A Girl Friend And Motor Bike?

What Is The Difference Between A Girl Friend And Motor Bike.

Motorbike Is First Kicked And Then Used,

While A Girlfriend Is First Used And Then Kicked.

Ladki Ki Mast T-Shirt

Pappu Ke Pados Mein Ek Nayi Familly Rahne Aayi,

Ek Din Uski Ladki Ne T–Shirt Pahni Hui Thhi Jispe Car Bani Hui Thi.

Papu Lagatar Usko Dekhe Ja Raha Thha, Ladki Ne Us Se Pucha.

Ladki: “Oye, Kabhi Car Nahi Dekhi Kya?”

Papu: “Ji, Car To Dekhi Hai, Par Itne Bade-Bade Speed Breaker Kabhi Nahi Dekhe“

Paisi Hum De Aur Maje Tum Lo

Santa Flight Mein Pilot Ke Headphones Chheen Ne Ki Koshish Kar Raha Tha.

Pilot Hairani Se: “Ye Kya Kar Rahe Hai, Sir?”

Santa: “Madharchod Ticket Hum Le, Aur Gaane Tum Suno, Chal Idhar De“

Apni Khushi Ke Liye Kisi Aur Ko Dukh Na Do

Sex Karte Hue Biwi Ko Shaq Hua Ki Bacha Jaag Raha Hai,

Biwi Ne Husband Ko Bola To Usne Bache Ko Doosre Kamre Mein Lita Diya,

Sex Karne Ke Baad Jab Husband Vapis Bache Ko Lene Gaya To Dekha Ki Bachha Mutth Mar Raha Hai

Husband Gusse Se: “Oyee, Ye Kya Kar Raha Hai Tu?”

Bachha Guuse Se Bola: “Apna Kaam Apne Haath Se Kar Raha Hu, Apni Khushi Ke Liye Kisi Ki Maa Nahi Chod Raha“

Why Love Is Better Then War?

Teacher Bachho Ko History Samjha Rahi Thhi, Ek Dum Se Usne Class Mein Bethe Bachho Se Puchha.

Teacher: “Why Love Is Better Then War?”

Chinki Khadi Hui Aur Muskurati Hue Boli

Chinki: “Madamji, Arey Aapko Itna Bhi Nahi Pata, Simple Because Condom Is Cheaper Then Gun.“

Call-Girl & Teaching Job

Call-girl Applies For A Teachers Job.

Principal: “Can you Teach Zoology, Biology, Geology & Physiology”

Girl: “No, I Can Teach Only Choos-Loji, Chaat-Loji, Daal-Loji & Nikal-Loji.“

Ladkiya Purse Mein Kya Kya Cheeze Rakhti Hai?

Santa Apni Ek College Friend Ke Sath Shopping Mall Mein Ghumne Gaya,

Vahan Ladki Ko Washroom Jana Hota Hai, To Santa Ko Apna Purse Dete Hue Bolti Hai

Girlfriend: “Yeh Purse Pakdo Mein Abhi Aayi”

Ab Santa Hai To Akal Se Sayana Hi, Socha Ki Dekhu Ladkiya Bag Mein Kya Rakhti Hai

Jaisi Hi Usne Purse Ko Khola Usmein Se Rubber Ka Lund Nikla.

Santa Ke Ye Dekh Ke Tote Udd Gaye Aur Usne Fatafatt Purse Band Kar Diya.

Ladki Washroom Se Aayi Aur Majak Majak Mein Usne Santa Ko Puchha.

Girlfriend: “Khola To Nahi?”

Santa: “Na Ji Na, Purse Khol Ke Mene Apni Gaand Thodi Fadwani Hai“

Boys Are The Best

During A Strike, Girls In The Crowd Shouted: “We Want Justice, We Want Justice”

While Boys From Behind Shouted: “We Want Just-Tits, We Want Just-Tits“

Call Girl VS Wife, True Comparison

William Sexfear’s Case Study On Wedding Decisions

Average Marital Life – 30 Yrs

Cost:

Marriage Expenses – Rs. 2,00,000
Monthly Expense – Rs.15,000
Wife’s Monthly Maintenance – Rs. 3,000

Returns:

Sex First 5 Yrs – Weekly 3 Times.
Next 5 Yrs  – Weekly 1 Time.
Next 10 Yrs  – Once In 15 Days.
Next 10 Yrs – Once In A Month.

Meaning:
1400 Times Sex In 30 Yrs 4 An Estimated Expenditure Of 66,80,000 + 2,00,000

Spent On Wedding @ 7% For 30 Years As Per Current Fd Interest Rate 29,84,890 = 99,64,890

Calculations:
A Man Spends Rs.7120 For Each Time He Has Sex With His Wife.

Conclusion:
Call Girls are Cheaper!

Ladke Aur Ladki Mein Asli Faraq, Chinki Ki Jubani

Teacher Ne Science Class Mein Chinki Se Puchha.

Teacher: “Ladki Or Ladke Mein Kya Farak Hai?”

Chinki: “Ji Ladki Chah Kar Bhi Ek Saal Mein Sirf Ek Hi Bache Ki Maan Ban Sakti Hai Aur Ladka Chahe To Ek Saal Mein 365 Bachon Ka Baap Ban Sakta Hai.“

Abe Ye Kya Dikha Diya Maine

Jaisa Ki Aap Jante Hai Ki Apne Santa Bhai Sahab Ek Company Mein Tikk Nahi Sakte.

Unke Kiye Gaye Kaam Ko Dekh Ke Company Wale Itne Khush Hote Hai Ki Unko Dusre Month Hi Bahar Nikal Dete Hai.

Isi Tarha Ek Bar Santa Ek Company Mein Interview Deke Aya, Aur Banta Ke Pass Ja Pahuncha, Banta Ne Us Se Puchha.

Banta: “Interview Kaisa Hua?”

Santa: “Yaar, Interview To Achha Hua Hai, Par Last Mein Unhone Kaha Ki, Show Your Testimonials.”

Banta: “Haan, To Firr?”

Santa: “Mujhe Lagta Hai Ki Main Unhe Galat Cheez Dikha Aaya.“

Aisi Akalmand Biwi, Bhagwan Kisi Ko Na De

Husband Bangkok Trip Par Gaya Hua Thha, Bahut Dino Tak Wapis Nahi Lauta.

Wife Ne Usko Email Kari Jismein Usmein Likha Thha.

“Darling, Waha Tum Jo Chhez Kharid Rahe Ho, Kya Mein Wo Yaha Bechna Shuru Kardu?”

Aur Pati Dusre Din Vapis Ghar Mein Thha

And The Winner Is Chinki

A Contest In A Girls College

“Write A Short Essay Which Contains Sex, Religion And Mystery.”

The Winners Was Chinki And The Essyy Was,

Oh God! I Am Pregnant And I Wonder Who Did It

Ese To Yaaro Tum Marr Hi Jaoge

Ustad Chodumal Khan Sahab Ji Ladko Ki Sex Ke Prati Ruchi Jagate Hue Sher Arz Karte Hai

Gunah Karke Tum Kyu Saza Se Darte Ho,

Condnm Pehan Ke Kyu Aids Se Darte Ho,

Itni Ladkiyaan Hai Pyaar Karne Ke Liye,

Phir Kyu Tum Lulli Hila Hila Ke Marte Ho?

Jhakkas Madam Ko Jhakkas Jawab

Ek Admi Bank Mein Paisi Nikalvane Gaya.

Udhar Ek Badi Mast Si Patakha Lady Cashier Bethi Thhi.

Lady Cashier Ne Puchha: “So Ke Loge?”

Aadmi Kameenepan Se Bola: “Ji Khade Khade Bhi Le Lunga.”

Mauja Hi Mauja, Coach Ki

A Girl Went To A Swimming Pool In A Bra & Panty.

Coach Says: Madam, “Here Two Piece Costume Is Not Allowed.”

Girl Says: “To Kaun Sa Utaroon?“

Duniya Ki Sabse Badi Choot Kiski Hai?

Is Duniya Mein Sabse Badi Choot Kiski Hai?

Sochoo????

Arey Yaar Apne Dharmender Bhai Ki Biwi Ki Re.

Puchho Kyu???

Kyunki Uska Khud Ka Beta Sunny Deol Ji Kahte Hai.

“Main Nikla Gaddi Leke“

Kash Aisi Mast Bhabhi Hume Bhi Mile

Ek Andha Ladka Sare Mohalle Mein Har Ghar Mein Jakar Mithayi Baant Raha Tha.

Ek Ghar Mein Gaya Jismein Ek Bahut Hi Sunder Babhi Ji Rahti Thhi.

Usne Darwaja Knock Kiya To Babhi Ki Awaj Aayi.

Babhi: “Kon Hai Bahar”

Ladka: “Babhi Ji Main Guddu, Aapko Mithayi Deni Thhi”

Ab Babhi Ji Ander Bathroom Mein Naha Rahi Thhi, Usne Socha Ki Isko Konsa Dikhta Hai Bina Kapde Pahne Hi Ja Ke Mithayi Le Leti Hu.

Babhi: “Aa Jao Ander Aur Darwaje Ke Sath Bed Hai, Uspe Betho Mein Abhi Ati Hu”

Ab Babhi Ji Bathroom Se Nangi Apne Mast Geele Badan Ke Sath Bahar Aayi Aur Guddu Ke Samne Jake Khadi Ho Gayi Aur Muskura Ke Boli.

Babhi: “Guddu Ji, Aaj Mithayi Kis Khushi Mein Khilayi Jaa Rahi Hai?”

Guddu Sharmate Hue: “Babhi Ji Meri Ankho Ka Operation Ho Gaya Hai Aur Mujhe Ab Dikhne Lag Gaya Hai, Is Khushi Mein”

James Bond’s Magical Watch

James Bond, Shows His Magic Watch To His New Girlfriend and Says

James Bond: “My Watch Says Your Not Wearing Panties”

Girlfriend: “But I Am Wearing, Your Watch Is Lying”

James Bind: “Ooops Sorry, My Watch Is 10 Minutes Fast ;)“

Sex Karne Ka New Tarika, By Santa Singh

Santa Apni Biwi Preeto Ke Sath Sex Kar Raha Thha, Par Usko Thoda Sa Tight Feel Hua.

To Usne Dimag Lagaya Aur Sath Mein Pade Glass Mein Se Doodh Liya Aur Lund Pe Laga Ke Chodna Shuru Kar Diya.

Aisa Karne Se Usko Itna Maja Aaya Ki Vo Roj Roj Yahi Karne Lag Gaya.

9 Mahine Bad Biwi Jab Pregnant Hui To Hospital Mein Admit Karvaya.

Jaisi Hi Doctor Operation Theater Se Bahar Nikla To Santa Ne Us Se Pucha.

Santa: “Dr Saab, Kya Hua Baby Ya Baba?”

Doctor Huste Hue: “No Baby Or No Baba, Only 1kg Paneer Nikla Hai, Yahi Khana Hai Ya Pack Kar Du“

Common Between Jaya Bachchan And Aishwarya?

Teacher: “What Is Common Between Jaya Bachchan And Aishwarya?”

Pappu After Much Thought: “I Think, Nipples Of Both Were Sucked By Abhishek“

Ladko Ko To Bas Ek Chance Milna Chahiye

Ladka Ladki Ka Do Mahine Se Affair Chal Raha Thha, Ladki Ne Ek Din Pappu Ke Paas Beth Ke Uske Hath Pe Apna Hath Rakh Ke Pyar Se Puchha.

Ladki: “Agar Chance Mila Toh Tum Mujh Se Shaadi Karo Gey?”

Ladka: “Agar Chance Mil Gaya To Phir Shaadi Karne Ki Kya Zaroorat Hai.“

Wah Re Bete, Tune To Kamal Kar Di

Ek Baap Apne 5th Class Mein Pad Rahe Bachhe Ko Knowledge Dene Ke Liye Bata Raha Thha.

Baap: “Pata Hai Bache Kaise Paida Hote Hain?”

Bacha: “Iss Main Aisi Kya Baat Hai, Mujhe Toh Yeh Bhi Pata Hai Kaise Paida Nahi Hote.“

Waiter Bhi Jhakkas Nikla

3 Dost Restrauant Mein Gaye Aur Waiter Se Majak Mein Bole
Dost: “Malika Ki Chut, Shilpa Ki Gaand And Katrina Ke Boobs Lekar Aao.”
Waiter 2 Tarbuj Laya Aur Bola.
Waiter: “Wo Sab To Khatam Hai, Par Ye Adnan Ke Tatte (Aand) Hai, Chalenge?“

Uncle, Asli Shaitan To Tu Hai

Train Mein Ek Lady Apne Bachhe Ko Lekar Kahi Ja Rahi Thhi, Par Uska Bacha Bada Hi Shaitan Thha Aur Usko Tang Kar Raha Thha.

Lady Ne Tang Aakar Samne Wali Seat Pe Bethe Uncle Se Request Ki.

Lady: “Uncle, Zara Mere Bachhe Ko Daraaiye, Shaitani Kar Raha Hai”

Uncle: “Oye Bhonsdi Chod Ke, Teri Maan Chod Duga, Shaitani Matt Kar”

Lady: “Rehne Do Uncle, Sahitani Hi Kar Lene Do“

Birthday Gift Idea, Tum Bhi Ese Hi Karna

Ek Lady Ne Apni Friend Se Puchha.
Lady: “Mujhe Husband Ko Birthday Par Kya Gift Dena Chahiya”
2nd Lady: “Raat Ko 12 Bajte Hi Nangi Hoke Taange Khol Ke Kehna… Jajhapanah Tussi Great Ho, Bhosda Qabul Karo“

Ek Kissa Divorce Ka Aisa Bhi

Court Mein Pati Aur Patni Ke Divorce Ki Bahas Chal Rahi Thhi.

Bahas Ka Mudda Ye Thha Ki, Bachha Kiske Pass Rahega?

Wife Jumped Up And Said: “Your Honour! I Brought The Child Into This World With Pain & Labour So It Should Be In My Custody.”

The Judge Turns To Husband And Says: “What Do You Have To Say In Your Defence?”

The Husband Sat For A While Contemplating Then Slowly Rose.

“Your Honour. If I Put A Dollar In A Vending Machine And A Pepsi Comes Out, Whose Pepsi Is It? The Machine’s Or Mine?”

Yeh Sunke Wife Replied: “Judge Sahab Bartan Mera Doodh Bhi Mera Aur Usme Dahi Jamane Ke Liye 2 Boond Daalne Se Dahi Bana To Fir Wo Dahi Kiska? Mera Ya Do Boond Daalne Wale Ka”

Husband Replied: “Typewriter Mein Kagaz Maine Dala, Keys Daba-Daba Kar Mehnat Maine Ki, Fir Chithi Kiski? Typewriter Ki Ya Meri?”

Frustrated Judge (Getting Mad): “Abay Saale Agar Tu Chithi Haath Se Hi Likh Leta, Toh Yahaan Par Custody Ki Naubat Hi Na Aati.“