Common Between Jaya Bachchan And Aishwarya?

Teacher: “What Is Common Between Jaya Bachchan And Aishwarya?”

Pappu After Much Thought: “I Think, Nipples Of Both Were Sucked By Abhishek“

Ladko Ko To Bas Ek Chance Milna Chahiye

Ladka Ladki Ka Do Mahine Se Affair Chal Raha Thha, Ladki Ne Ek Din Pappu Ke Paas Beth Ke Uske Hath Pe Apna Hath Rakh Ke Pyar Se Puchha.

Ladki: “Agar Chance Mila Toh Tum Mujh Se Shaadi Karo Gey?”

Ladka: “Agar Chance Mil Gaya To Phir Shaadi Karne Ki Kya Zaroorat Hai.“

Wah Re Bete, Tune To Kamal Kar Di

Ek Baap Apne 5th Class Mein Pad Rahe Bachhe Ko Knowledge Dene Ke Liye Bata Raha Thha.

Baap: “Pata Hai Bache Kaise Paida Hote Hain?”

Bacha: “Iss Main Aisi Kya Baat Hai, Mujhe Toh Yeh Bhi Pata Hai Kaise Paida Nahi Hote.“

Waiter Bhi Jhakkas Nikla

3 Dost Restrauant Mein Gaye Aur Waiter Se Majak Mein Bole
Dost: “Malika Ki Chut, Shilpa Ki Gaand And Katrina Ke Boobs Lekar Aao.”
Waiter 2 Tarbuj Laya Aur Bola.
Waiter: “Wo Sab To Khatam Hai, Par Ye Adnan Ke Tatte (Aand) Hai, Chalenge?“

Uncle, Asli Shaitan To Tu Hai

Train Mein Ek Lady Apne Bachhe Ko Lekar Kahi Ja Rahi Thhi, Par Uska Bacha Bada Hi Shaitan Thha Aur Usko Tang Kar Raha Thha.

Lady Ne Tang Aakar Samne Wali Seat Pe Bethe Uncle Se Request Ki.

Lady: “Uncle, Zara Mere Bachhe Ko Daraaiye, Shaitani Kar Raha Hai”

Uncle: “Oye Bhonsdi Chod Ke, Teri Maan Chod Duga, Shaitani Matt Kar”

Lady: “Rehne Do Uncle, Sahitani Hi Kar Lene Do“

Birthday Gift Idea, Tum Bhi Ese Hi Karna

Ek Lady Ne Apni Friend Se Puchha.
Lady: “Mujhe Husband Ko Birthday Par Kya Gift Dena Chahiya”
2nd Lady: “Raat Ko 12 Bajte Hi Nangi Hoke Taange Khol Ke Kehna… Jajhapanah Tussi Great Ho, Bhosda Qabul Karo“

Ek Kissa Divorce Ka Aisa Bhi

Court Mein Pati Aur Patni Ke Divorce Ki Bahas Chal Rahi Thhi.

Bahas Ka Mudda Ye Thha Ki, Bachha Kiske Pass Rahega?

Wife Jumped Up And Said: “Your Honour! I Brought The Child Into This World With Pain & Labour So It Should Be In My Custody.”

The Judge Turns To Husband And Says: “What Do You Have To Say In Your Defence?”

The Husband Sat For A While Contemplating Then Slowly Rose.

“Your Honour. If I Put A Dollar In A Vending Machine And A Pepsi Comes Out, Whose Pepsi Is It? The Machine’s Or Mine?”

Yeh Sunke Wife Replied: “Judge Sahab Bartan Mera Doodh Bhi Mera Aur Usme Dahi Jamane Ke Liye 2 Boond Daalne Se Dahi Bana To Fir Wo Dahi Kiska? Mera Ya Do Boond Daalne Wale Ka”

Husband Replied: “Typewriter Mein Kagaz Maine Dala, Keys Daba-Daba Kar Mehnat Maine Ki, Fir Chithi Kiski? Typewriter Ki Ya Meri?”

Frustrated Judge (Getting Mad): “Abay Saale Agar Tu Chithi Haath Se Hi Likh Leta, Toh Yahaan Par Custody Ki Naubat Hi Na Aati.“